REJECTION in Online Dating

It happened again and it is hard not to let it affect you.  I had spent some time going through the profiles and selected 4 men who I felt some sort of attraction for either in their profile or in their picture.  Its a tough way to really find out about a potential mate, but it is the only way available in most dating sites.  I send out the “winks”, and hoped for the best.  The next morning I had an email reply indicating that one of my “potentials” had rejected my profile and that was the only reply I ever received. Rejection is hard to take even if it is on an impersonal dating site.

We all want to be liked or at least respected and ignoring any connection on a dating site seems rude and disrespectful.  It only takes a moment to reply as most dating sites have an automated reply and only requires you to check the box.  These are the 5 reasons I have conjured up to soothe my own wounded ego and explain why most men never reply;

1.  They never check their email box
2.  They are just lookie-loos and never go to the next stage
3.  They figure it is better to not reply than to give a negative reply
4.  They are looking for a 35-year old with a 44″ bustline that just inherited a million bucks
5.  They really don’t give a damn!

What are men looking for?  Obviously not for “Down-to-earth practical senior gal who only occasionally indulges in hopelessly romantic fantasies and thinks maybe love can still happen”. Should I tweak my profile?  Should I post a younger-looking picture?  Are there tricks to this scene I am not aware of?  These are all the questions running through my head every time I try to play the online dating game and face rejection once again.  I know it is a numbers game of sorts, the more contacts you make the more chances you have of finding someone compatible, but it can be very discouraging and depressing.

Maybe its harder when you are in your senior dating years, there are certainly fewer prospects than before.  Most senior men seem to be seeking much younger women, perhaps they think it will keep them young or perhaps they have a Hugh Hefner complex.  Where are the mature responsible men who are sincerely seeking love, companionship and a relationship, not still chasing their middle-age illusions?  Are there any good ones left or am I just chasing  my own illusion?

admin at DateGranny.com

Underground Dating on CLASSMATES.COM

A underground method for senior online dating can be found on Classmates.com.  Just check out the years you went to high school and renew old friendships, you might just find your new love among your former loves or sometimes the one you remembered as the geekiest one is now a stud!

Classmates.com does not really represent themselves as an online dating site, but there are plenty of opportunities to match up and connect with people from your past.  After all, these are all people you already have a common bond with shared memories (good & bad) and immediate subjects of conversation.  It can be much easier to strike up a friendship or even a romance this way than with a perfect stranger.  Classmates.com does charge for a membership, but then so do most of the dating services, just think of it as a new weapon in your online dating arsenal.

Most high school & college alumni now have reunions at least every 5 years, some are more often.  Classmates.com is the perfect place to find out if and when your class might be holding a reunion.  Reunions are a MUST DO on your senior dating list, lots of old romances have been rekindled at a high school reunion many years later.  I recently met a couple who married after meeting at their 50th high school reunion.  They hadn’t even really known each other in HS.  She was widowed and lived in Iowa, he was divorced and lived in Las Vegas, they remarried after about a year and now spend winters in Vegas & summers in much cooler Iowa, what a way to go!

My own HS holds a reunion every 5 years and I would not miss it!  We were a rather large class and still have almost 200 in attendance.  I have been to every one since my 15th reunion and it is great fun to keep up with old friends, many are now on my email list.  At the last reunion I did spy one of my old beaus and we shared a dance after dinner, unfortunately (for me anyway) he seems very happily married….DARN IT!

admin @DateGranny.com

E-mail Romance

It happened again and I fail to really understand. I actively participate in 3 different online dating sites but the only requests I ever get are from younger men that are usually from a different city, sometimes quite far away from my own.

My suspicion is that they are not really sincere, just lonely and looking for someone to communicate with or perhaps they are looking for someone to take care of them, a sugar-mommy? Maybe I should be flattered that a younger man would even fiend an interest, but I am not, I find it curious at best and certainly not practical.

Now don’t get me wrong, I enjoy the company of people of all ages and sometimes a conversation with a younger person can be quite stimulating on an intellectual level. But a romance is something entirely different, I feel you need to have lived the same or similiar experiences to be on the same wave-length. You need common interests and energy levels and that just doesn’t happen with a 20-year difference in ages.

I’m really not looking for an email romance I want a companion & lover, someone to share joys, passions, triumphs and disappointments with. I think that is what most people of all ages want but as you age I guess you get more practical in your viewpoint and opinions.

I really don’t think my ego is strong enough to truly have a romance with a much younger man. I think he would look at my wrinkles and sagging skin and be turned off. Hopefully someone who shares those same life changes would be more accepting and caring. It happens to all of us eventually, even in this age of Botox and Reversatrol there is only so much preservation you can do.

Have other senior women had this some experience with the online dating sites? Please comment your opinions, I would like to have your input!

admin @ DateGranny.com